Family Fashion Feud
by Hime Juusan
Summary: Based on Robin and Lucina's support conversation with the female avatar as Lucina's mother. An alternate version where Robin reluctantly wears the dress Lucina bought for her. Full of OOC humor.


Robin was a dedicated mother. She loved both her children to death and would practically do anything for them. Every loyal Sherperd knows this.

Go climb the tallest mountain ever created on the face of the continent? Sure.

Eat moldy food that tasted like complete garbage? Only if there's a trashcan to puke in nearby.

Fight endless hordes of Risen day and night? No problem.

Swim singlehandedly with her hands tied behind her back all the way to the continent of Valm? She was invincible.

Wear the dreaded rainbow-colored, multi-shaped dress with giant pink polka dots printed with Emmeryn's face on them that her precious daughter wants her to wear?

Now she wasn't so sure…

"Mother, please! This would look so nice on you. It's very modern," Lucina begged in that voice she knew that would break down her mother's defense mechanism.

This is what modern clothing is like? If that's the case, then Robin would gladly continue to be old-fashioned for the rest of her life.

But to think her own daughter would have such horrid taste in clothing…

Robin resisted, "I-I'm sorry, Lucina, but this dress is just not suited for me." Wearing the dress would mean her death.

"Oh really?" Lucina cast her eyes down, clearly disappointed. "Maybe this will look good on you?" She held up a very thin cloth that you can practically see right through.

It was a pile of strings with a touch of cloth scraps.

_Oh gods, anything but that._

"Maybe I will stick to that dress earlier. Now that I think about it, the unusual…colors truly fascinates me," Robin said hurriedly.

Lucina beamed at that. "Really?! Then let's have you try it on!"

Robin sighed deeply. This was not going to end well.

xxx

"It looks great on you, mother," Lucina smiled brightly as Robin came out of the changing room.

"Yes, it does…"

Someone, anyone, please kill her now. She would gladly have a million Risen archers shoot arrows at her. Surely nothing would be as horrible as this experience.

Just spare her the humiliation.

"Let's go show father! He'll just scream with delight when he sees you in this," Lucina suggested, grabbing Robin's wrist.

Oh, he'll scream all right.

"W-what?! Wait, I don't—L-Lucina! LUCINA! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Robin cried out as she was forcibly dragged out the door by her stubborn daughter.

xxx

Chrom was screaming the moment he saw her.

Now that was to be expected.

Robin winced at the brutal beating of her eardrums. She couldn't tell what Chrom was thinking of as she never saw that expression on his face before.

It wasn't sad, happy, angry, shocked, or anything like that, just blank.

He slowly walked towards her as if she was a fire-breathing monster. "Robin…just w-what…are you wearing?" he stammered out heatedly.

Robin tried to explain, "Er, I can explain, you see—"

Then Chrom smiled the biggest smile on the face of humanity, "Gods, it even has portraits of Emm on it! You should wear clothes like this more often. It really suits you."

Robin blinked. "…What?" What did he just say? Did she hear him right?

No way.

"I have a full closet of shirts and pants that look like this, but for some reason Lissa was furious and forbade me from ever wearing them. She said they looked horrible, but how can they when they have Emm's face on it?" Chrom looked visibly confused.

She didn't know anything about any of this. Since when did he like this sort of thing?

Does that mean Lucina got her taste in clothing from Chrom?

Robin was flabbergasted.

Lucina suddenly grabbed her arm. "See? Told you he would scream. Come on, let's show Morgan!"

Robin was in too much shock to protest.

xxx

Morgan was screaming the moment he saw her.

Robin flinched as her poor eardrums received the loud sound waves. If this keeps up, she'll go deaf soon.

"M-mother, just what in gods are you wearing?!" Morgan's eyes were popped out of his sockets, his jaw on the floor.

Robin would laugh at his expression if it wasn't for the fact that it was because of what she was wearing right now. "Well…"

Lucina intervened, "I bought this dress for mother. Doesn't it just look gorgeous on her?" Her eyes literally shined with pure happiness.

Morgan gaped. "Gorgeous? Lucina, are you blind?! What part of that—" He pointed at the dress. "—that dress is gorgeous? It's hideous!"

Lucina narrowed her eyes to dangerous slits, a hand on Falchion's hilt. "Oh? Care to say that again?"

"I said it was ugly! Where did you even buy it? Polka dots are so overrated! They're HUGE, too. Why are they pink? And what's the deal with Queen Emmeryn's portraits on them?! The designer must have been really desperate!" he yelled out.

"Hmph. Fine, but both father and mother said that they liked it," Lucina said proudly, pointing her nose up.

"Now, now, Lucina, Morgan is entitled to his own opinion," Robin chided gently.

Thank Naga there was at least one other person in the family who had some sense of what fashion was.

Still, Robin needed to escape to an isolated island and burn the dress, while laughing maniacally she may add, and throw its ashes into the sea.

There was no way she was ever going to wear it again.

And if Lucina ever asked about its whereabouts, she could just tell her that Gaius stole it.

But all this mayhem wasn't a total loss, she now knows about Lucina and Chrom's secret.

If she ever got stuck on giving either of them a gift, she would just need to go to a random dump of clothing and pick clothes that she absolutely hated and draw Emmeryn's face on them.

.

.

.

* * *

I know they're out of character, but I still had fun writing this. :D


End file.
